As news about the COVID-19 crisis started to unfold, I was naïve to think it would not affect our community because as we jokingly say, "we go to school in the middle of nowhere." I firmly believed we could not be impacted by something as small as a virus. However, as I heard news of other schools canceling their seasons, reality set in. I knew our season had a timer ticking, despite how much I convinced myself into thinking otherwise.

On March 13, we finished one of our final practices before we were scheduled to start our spring trip down to Baltimore and play some of the most difficult games of our season. The excitement and anticipation had been leading up to this trip all season long. That evening, we were dealt the devastating blow via email. I was flooded with text messages from fellow teammates on what was happening and how the news would impact our season. They were looking for answers and explanations when neither were available. 

My fellow captain and I organized a team meeting with all 52 members attending. We sat in that room, heartbroken, tears flowing, and silent. We all knew how everyone was feeling without having to express it through words. The hardest part of that meeting was the uncertainty of whether our special group would be able to take the field and showcase our ability together again. 

In uncertain times, we have two options: we can either look back and dwell on the hand we were dealt or we can persevere as a group and lean on each other for strength. I am proud to say our team has found ways to proceed with just as much optimism and enthusiasm as we had before every game or practice we attended. The bonds that we have formed with one another will never be lost, and the challenges we have faced this spring have strengthened those bonds.

We have stayed in touch in various ways, whether it is setting up team meetings and positional meetings, or the self-talks in which each person on our team gives an update of what they are currently doing and reflects on the past year. These moments have become the highlights of my days. Although the virus has taken us out of Canton and prevented us from spending time with each other in person, our conversations continue as if we were sitting next to one another.

The situation we currently find ourselves in is certainly one that comes with stress and sorrow. At times, it can feel like all of the preparation we dedicated to a sport and the people we love so much was meaningless. But, there is so much more that goes into a season than what is recorded in the season statistics. This COVID-19 crisis can take away our season, potential wins and losses, our goals, and our time together on campus, but it cannot take away the incredible bonds we have formed with each other.

As my time with St. Lawrence comes to a close, I would like to thank Mike Mahoney, Tom Ryan and R.J. Ehli for their dedication to improving each athlete individually and demonstrating the highest level of professionalism. In times of distress, we were always able to fall back on the coaches and rely on them to help us through our troubles. Our team's success and deep-rooted love for each other starts with their ability to bring our team together. 

The Saints tradition runs deep and I can't wait to see the future success of the St. Lawrence men's lacrosse program. Rather than dwelling on what we were unable to accomplish, I have been reflecting on all the positive times I have had at St. Lawrence. I know there will be some sort of celebration to provide closure for this senior class and I look forward to seeing everyone then.

Mike Donnelly '20 is a senior on the men's lacrosse team. This piece is part of a series of stories by student-athletes about how St. Lawrence student-athletes saw their academic and athletic plans change rapidly as the spread of COVID-19 across the nation caused St. Lawrence to make the transition to remote learning instruction after spring break. If you are a St. Lawrence student-athlete interested in participating in this project, please contact Aaron Todd at atodd@stlawu.edu.